I-Laugh Archives
Your Working Humor Discussion List

............................................
I-Laugh - Your 'Working' Humor Discussion List
---------------------------------------------
Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg  mailto:eva@workinghumor.com

Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf   mailto:gunjan@workinghumor.com

http://workinghumor.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
03rd April  2002    #     Issue 53
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Murphy's Postal Law:
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

IN THIS DIGEST   :

Moderator's Comment -
                          ~ Gunjan
_____________________

CONTINUING DISCUSSIONS

It wasn't All Bull...
                            ~ Scott Simmerman

Complacency & Prayer
                            ~ Gunjan

Speaker Tips
                               ~ from Tom Antion

NEW DISCUSSIONS
Do you knock out your students/subordinates ?
                               ~ Gunjan

AN ANNOUNCEMENT
                               ~ Gunjan

THIS WEEK'S HUMOR
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

----------------   SPONSOR MESSAGE   -----------------

"NEED INK?... It's NO 'Laughing' matter when ya run out!"
Worse yet, Paying RETAIL prices! SAVE Up TO 80%!....

High Quality Ink Jet Cartridges, Refill  Kits and JetPak
pre-paid Mailers... Satisfaction IS Guaranteed!
FREE Printer Utilities! Come Save Now!
http://www.MaxPatchInk.com?laugh

----------  Please Support Our Kind Sponsor  ---------

Moderator's Message
-------------------------------------------------

Dear LaughMates,

We got just 5 responses for the naming help that
I asked for. (5 out of 913, the percentage is so
dismal I don't feel like working it out!) Two said, Issue
# 53, (why disturb the flow?){cause I'll have trouble
once we reach the hundred mark! ;-}, the next said
Issue 2.1, 2.2 etc. (but I don't want I-Laugh to start
crashing!) one said Vol 2 Issue 1 and just one said
that the whole discussion is silly. Not wanting to go
with the silent majority and leave the Issue numberless
I've decided to go with the vociferous majority :-) !

Thanks to all 5 of you writing in. For the rest of you....
GOOD MORNING!! (Hope I've woken you up enough
to take part in our next discussion, to visit our
wonderful sponsors, and maybe enough to volunteer
to be guest moderators.

Ah, that brings me to the next point! We do have a
guest moderator from the next issue. Uncle Joe,
(formerly Joseph Harris ;-), runs a wonderful website
SmilePoetryWeekly.com
and an even more cheerful newsletter called
Smile Poetry Weekly.

Here's a little sample Dotty Ditty from his newsletter...

Buzzing Bee

The moon is high,
The tree is short.
I hear the buzzing bee to port.

How quick she flits
>From flower to flower -
She does a lot in half an hour.

But if she's buz--
Zing in moonlight
I think her timing's not quite right.
~ Uncle Joe Bard

In his former life (as Joseph Harris) he worked on The
Financial Times and The Times and did various other
journalisms including editing a monthly which was still
set in hot metal. He used to love watching the linotype
compositors at The Times when he was graveshift sub on
Times Business News (a concept that bit the dust under
Murdoch). He also had a brief spell in precision engineering
- not precise enough.

He trained for horticulture and
found myself on the local council just in time to become a
full time negotiator over one of Thatcher's madnesses.

After discussing with him about being our Guest Moderator,
I told him that he would start with Issue #54 as I'd like to
introduce him in Issue #53. He replied.... "I think an issue
to warn all and sundry to take to the hills is a good idea."

That's about the next issue. Now moving ahead to the
highlights from Back Issues I got a great suggestion.
Not to have special issues for them but carry an item once
in a way whenever conversation was dull.

Now with no further ado, let's move to I-Laugh # 53

Gunjan
http://www.JestforPun.com
coz 7 days without a pun makes one weak

P

P.P.S - Please invite your friends to subscribe by sending an email to:
64841-subscribe@zinester.com


Please, send any comments to:
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=Comments


---------------   SPONSOR MESSAGE   -----------------
Internet solutions customized precisely to your
needs so you sell more, work smarter, grow faster.
              > design | multimedia | eCommerce | database <
              >  >  hosting | CRM | marketing | promotion   < <
Contact us today for a free strategic consultation.
mailto:info@ikestrel.com http://www.ikestrel.com

----------  Please Support Our Kind Sponsor  ---------

=====  Continuing Discussions  =====

====> It wasn't All Bull...

All this talk of teamwork, young bulls and old bulls and carts
is useful -- in fact I will use that specific approach in my next
Square Wheels of Teamwork and Collaboration presentation.
Thanks.

But it also reminded me of that old story about planning and
perspective, so I may also add that to my presentation.

Seems that this young, energetic bull and this old, mature and
wise bull were moving up the hill.  The young bull, new to the
pasture, was full of spit and vinegar and all set to give 100%
of his effort to any initiative that made sense.

As they crest the top, they spot a herd of cows in the pasture
in the valley.

"Let's say we run down and get one!" says the young bull
to the old bull.

"Let's say we walk down and get them all." replies the old bull.

As the story sets up, having a realistic sense of pace and a clear set
of goals is important to any team initiative.  Sometimes energy and
speed need to be balanced with perspective and planning!

--

For the FUN of It!

Scott Simmerman - "The Square Wheels Guy"
Performance Management Company - 800-659-1466
       <mailto:Scott@SquareWheels.com>

- Tools for Training and Development <http://www.squarewheels.com/>
- Scott as Speaker <http://www.simmerman.com/>


Comments :
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=Bull

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

======> Complacency and Prayer

A couple of Issues back we were discussing complacency
especially in Public Speaking.

Well, it seems Mark Twain got complacent too. Once. He
had launched into his favorite joke in front of a huge audience
when halfway through the joke he realized that he had forgotten
the punchline. As he kept narrating the joke he wondered what
to do and even launched into a little prayer in his head.

Hardly had he finished the prayer, when the ground started
shaking. It was a minor earth quake and people ran helter
skelter for shelter. Naturally, Mark Twain's speech was
forgotten in the melee. Twain says he thanked God that
day but has never since had the courage to pray for
anything else.

So again, Beware of complacency and be careful with
your prayers!

:-)

Gunjan
WZ-ard of Humorous Quotes
http://www.wz.com/arts/HumorousQuotations.html

Comments :
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=complacency
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

===> Speaking Tips

The Eyes Have It...
A quick tip from Tom Antion.

Try this in your next five speeches. Hold eye contact with
each audience member you look at for a full four seconds.
When I am critiquing videos of even very experienced
speakers sometimes I feel like the speaker is watching a
tennis match or worse yet a ping pong match. They
oscillate back and forth never really connecting with anyone.
If you hold that eye contact just shy of the point where you
would be considered staring, I will bet you find that more
people want to talk to you after your speech. Try it and let
me know how it works.

Tom Antion
Great Speaking

You can subscribe to his free newsletter 'Great Speaking'
To subscribe why not use our affiliate link (given below)

http://www.listpartners.com/cgi-local/subscribe?2606

Comments or if have you a tip to share -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=speakertips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cartoon Break

Peer Pressure
http://jokeworm.com/Cl23.htm

Still Figuring
http://jokeworm.com/Cl26.htm

Dangerous Games!
http://dailymegajoke.com/toons.php?00580560

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

====> New Discussion

====> Do you knock out your students/subordinates ?

Hi Friends,

I visited a great website this week. One with tips
on developing limerick writing skills. (Some of you
who are subscribed to my Jest for Pun, know how badly
I need to develop this skill :-)

As I found the quite a few tips helpful, I took the trouble
to sign the guest book. The guest book had quite a few
questions like do you write limericks, do you hate limericks,
(I didn't find a single person who wrote limericks cause
he/she hated them! :-)

It also had a column saying do you have a fractured limerick
which could with some repair.

Well, I could have submitted practically everything I've
written so far :-), but I chose to put in this one....

Doctor - please listen to this rant,
I was writing about the Aliphant,
Attempt ill fated,
It's trunk ate it

~ Gunjan

This was a late night visit and promptly after finishing,
I switched off my computer and went to sleep.

Next morning, the first thing that I see in my mail is a
reply from the good doc, and the subject says your
fractured limerick just died. In the mail also he had
taken off on how the rhyme was all junk, the meter
terrible and that there was no such word as Aliphant.

He had signed off saying I'd be better off collecting
funny pictures instead.

For a couple of minutes I was shocked, then started
seeing the humor of the situation. You start a site
teaching people how to write limericks and then tell
aspiring writers to collect funny pictures instead !
What do you expect... Edward Lear or Isaac Asimov
to learn from you?

The whole thing reminded me of an incident from the movie
Jungle Book, which I promptly wrote back to him ...

Baloo decides to teach Mowgli how to box and knocks
him cold with his first demo punch. Bagheera smiles
and says "Your student is sure going to learn a lot when
you knock him out with your first lesson!" or words to that
effect.

However, come to think of it, this knocking out of students/
subordinates is quite a common phenomenon. How many
times have you heard the statements... "You'll never pass
this exam!", "You'll never learn accounting in your life!",
"There's no real point in explaining this as you're sure to
goof up, anyway!" And we expect those people to learn
in spite of those knock out punches.... learn from us! :-)

So, have you been knocking out your students/subordinates
too?

Gunjan
The never give up
WZ-ard of Humorous Poetry :-)
http://www.wz.com/arts/HumorousPoetry.html

Comments :
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=knockout
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

===========  Announcement  ==========

Dear Laughmates,

As none of you seemed to keen on an online party, we are
celebrating I-Laugh's Birthday in another way. By Launching
another list! The new list is called Jest in Literature and is
headed by another Laughmate JD Lentz (The Doc). The Doc
has taught literature for over 15 years and in most unorthodox
ways. (We had discussed one of methods back in Issue #41
http://www.workinghumor.com/archives/issue41.htm
If you do take a peek at the url you'll find that
Jest in Literature has been on the anvil for quite some time and
I'm thrilled it's launch coincides with I-Laugh's birthday.

Here's what The Doc has to say about our list ...

You've got three weeks to write a play for your boss's birthday.
It's got to be great. All his beer-swillin', ditch diggin', field workin',
chick-chasin' buddies from the country will be with him. The play
has got to make the boss proud. It can't make fun of him.  It's got
to include lots of these things: drinking, sex, blood, sex, gore, sex,
and some sex and blood and gore. And it's got to end with
everything being set straight as it should be. Use anyone you want
for actors. Oh, except you can't use any women. You'll have to
dress some men up for the sex parts. And don't forget jokes, and
they have to be jokes that all his animal friends will understand, so
keep it simple. Screw it up, and you'll probably lose more than
just your job.

These are the conditions that Shakespeare wrote under. Sure, they
used different words four hundred years ago, but they still talked
about the same stuff:  sex, blood, money, and then some more sex.
You just need to learn what things were called. If the peasants got
the jokes, why not you? The crowds were full of sweaty, drunken,
screaming, hollering men. You think they went to see men in tights?
Would you? There must be something more.

Shakespeare wasn't a "high-brow." You don't need to be one to
understand him. So loosen up your cod-piece a notch or two and
let's go find out what the punchlines are to all those dirty jokes!
There might even be some other stuff hidden in there.

Hell, when we get done with the plays, let's move on to real man's
work: poetry. And keep the goddam kids outta here! They don't need
to be learning this stuff!

If that's got you fired up, the way it's got me, subscribe by sending
a blank email to lit-subscribe@topica.com (and yes The Doc wasn't
kidding about keeping the kids out. This is going to be an Adult list)

Hope to see many of you there with us,

Thanks,
Gunjan

Learn Literature from The Doc!
The Doc teaches Lit with wit!!

Subscribe to Jest with Literature, mail lit-subscribe@topica.com

===========  This week's Humor  ==========

Emergency Vehicle
===========
ON MY FIRST day as an MP, my partner and I were approaching
an intersection when the car in front of us went flying through
a red light.

As I started to pursue the car, my partner reached over
and turned on our lights and siren.

Instinctively, I slowed down and pulled over. When my partner
asked what I was doing, I told him I was stopping for the
emergency vehicle.

"That's us, you idiot!" he shouted.
"Now go get that car!"

(--Contributed by SSgt. Troy L. Benningfield
To Jo-Lene's Daily Humor)

Comments :
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=humor

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I

I-Laugh is edited by:
Eva Rosenberg mailto:eva@workinghumor.com

Information on how to advertise in I-Laugh :
http://workinghumor.com/advertise.shtml

FAQ, Information & Archives at our website,
http://workinghumor.com

Copyright Gunjan Saraf and Eva Rosenberg

YOU have permission to publish any part of I-Laugh
electronically free of charge, under the following
conditions:

First: The author of the piece receives full credit,
with all links to their e-mail address &/or site intact

Second: The following byline is included.
"This article is reproduced with permission from I-Laugh,
Your Working Humor Discussion List.
http://www.workinghumor.com
Copyright Gunjan Saraf and Eva Rosenberg "

However, if you are getting paid for your  publication
(it is by paid subscription), please be good enough to
contact us to arrange a payment  to us for the material
you are using.

A courtesy copy of your publication would be appreciated..

Home

I -Laugh

Info for Newbies
Submission Guidelines
Archives
Articles Index
Advertise


Business Cartoons

Resources

Selling Humor

Professional Humor
Medical Humor
Educational Humor
Military Humor
Advertising Humor

If you've had enough 'Serious' Humor relax in our 'pun' zone -
Jest For Pun

About Us

Contact Us



If you had learnt French and its getting rusty
you're in the same boat as us.
Join us as we share jokes, funny poems etc
(along with help files) and row hard ;!
Facebook Page
Blog


Check out WorkingHumor.com's new Facebook Page


Check out WorkingHumor.com's new Facebook Page



WorkingHumor.com now has a Facebook Page. It's still a baby, hasn't learnt how to dance yet
but maybe you're the one we're waiting for, to get the party started ;o!
Check it out here

Custom Search