Your Working Humor Discussion List
I-Laugh - Your 'Working' Humor Discussion List
Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org
Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf mailto:email@example.com
22nd May 2002 # Issue 60
Happy Birth Anniversary Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
IN THIS DIGEST :
Moderator's Comment -
The Other Moderator's Comment
~ Moderators' Comments
Speaking of Speaking
Speaking Tips (Hats)
~ from Tom Antion
More Play Talk
THIS WEEK'S HUMOR
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We'll got a lot of fun things in this issue. Lots of talk on speaking and fun with play talk.
So my comments have been carried forward to the next issue.
On with I-Laugh #60.
With Best Wishes,
Many a true word is spoken in jest.
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Jest in Literature (A) - firstname.lastname@example.org
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The Other Moderator's Message
Last weekend I went to a party my cousin put on for his son's graduation
from USC. I've been so buried in my work lately, that I hadn't seen many of my family members for, I guess, longer than I realized.
First shock. All the boys are around six feet tall. Stephen, the 21
graduate, was comparing his height with Benjamin, my 15 year-old nephew.
The last time I saw at Ben, he had just passed my height.
I was talking to Ben as one of my cousins came by, a contemporary. Teddy looked at Ben, patted him on the cheek and made some uncle-y
comment about, 'My, how you've grown,' and wandered off.
It gave me such a chill of deja-vu. Ohmigosh, when did we get that old?!
That was the kind of thing my elderly aunts and uncles used to do. (Ok,
they just seemed old, then. They must have been at least 40 or 50.)
Let's juxtapose this with my meeting with my client last Friday. E. is recently widowed, and a little over 60, blonde hair with grey
streaks. Our elevator and lobby have been inaccessible all week due to remodeling. So I had to go down and bring her up the stairs. She walked
in front of me - and this was my view. Picture this, at my eye level:
Long, slender legs, wrapped tightly in dark grey, Guess jeans, just below
a really tush. Straight back, covered with a pink silk, ribbed knit
that draped lightly over all the curves.
Had I been a man...This OLD lady looks stunning. She'd been married
so long she'd forgotten about dating. But, can you believe it, she has
even 15 years younger, chasing after her. Hey, I wish I looked so good.
I clue you, my grandmother never looked so hot!
My questions to you are, have our perceptions of age changed?
Or has middle age, and elderly really been pushed way back?
And how does this change the way you plan your own life?
And does this change the way you handle your business contacts?
Your Comic Guide,
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===== Continuing Discussions =====
There is no Toastmasters club in Israel.
They teach you to listen not to talk.
Probably the reason for not having one in Israel... -:)
Arik Schenkler - CEO
Use Internet Dollar electronic money for anonymity,
finalization of deal and fee free funds movements
from peer to peer - http://InternetDollar.com
Moderator's Comments -
Nothing personal, Arik, but if that's not the most absurd statement I've ever seen!
An Israeli who LISTENS?????
Give me 10 Sabras - and you'll have 15 opinions -
all strongly held and very vocal. ;~)
P.S. Incidentally, really, if there IS no Toastmasters in Israel,
maybe you should think of starting one?
=== > Speaking of Speaking
You already know that getting up in front of a group is one of the hardest and most stressful things you can do. I can remember the
first time I had to formally do that, in a speech class in the eight
Well, you know, California has earthquakes? So, I walked up to the front of the room, hoping desperately that there would be one now, and
the earth would swallow me up and I'd never have to go through with it. Didn't happen. And when I finally reached the front of the room, as I knew
it would, all the well-rehearsed information fled my mind. And I stood
there, waiting for it to return. Notes helped. As I stumbled through what
had been a smooth eloquent speech in my bedroom earlier that same
So, you know I have sympathy for people just coming to grips with having to get up in public. In college, I took another speech class.
I needed credits, and the subject terrified me, so I forced myself to take it.
Naturally, whenever we'd break down into groups, I'd find myself in charge of getting us organized. (Secret, if no else steps in, just
assume responsibility.) Somehow, I'd find a way to cajole the quietest, shyest member of each group to craft a speech and present it.
We'd all pitch in and help, and then be there to encourage them as they did their speech.
That helped boost my own confidence. So, when our finals came up and we had to prepare a speech to convince someone to change their
opinion about something, I tackled the biggie. "Why We're Better Off with a Totalitarian Government." Of course, I did it with a twist -
first discussing ways to improve how education is organized or directed, so
we all end up with interesting productive jobs; How, with some well-thought-out, planning, our farmers could grow exactly the right crops for
the population; How, with better management and planning tools, manufacturers would make just the right amount of products - no
excesses or waste. etc. Then, when I had everyone nodding and agreeing with me, I hit them with putting the government in charge of
all the planning.
Well, if they'd had rotten tomatoes...! But they couldn't help laughing at how I took them in.
Was there a point to all this? Perhaps. When you must speak, even about boring things, find a way to bring a twist to it. Play with your
topic. After all, if I can make taxes amusing, you can entertain anyone in your own field.
Your Humble Guide,
=== > Speaking Tips
HATS by Tom Antion
Hats can be lots of fun during a presentation and they can also help you keep on track without using notes.
I use hats as an outline of my presentation. Let's say I was talking to a company about the past, present and future of their
marketing. I might use one of those funny ball caps that has a long pony tail attached to it and talk about how when this
company first started it was wild and carefree in it's marketing efforts.
I would put this funny cap on or have an audience member volunteer wear it. The humor really starts here and in many cases
you don't have to say a word. The audience members may start picking on one of their male buddies who is bald or one of their
short haired female colleagues who always wanted long hair.
Next I might use a top hat to signify a more conservative old time banker when I talk about the growth years of the company up
until the present. Again, I wear the hat or pass it out to an audience member.
When I talk about the future, I would use some kind of spaceman, futuristic looking hat that maybe had antennae attached. Some of
the magic shops carry a funny lie detector hat with wires all over it that you can operate by remote control. You could make up
a funny lie detector test customized to the company and have a participant on stage who lies about every answer. I've seen that
an it is hilarious. If you can get the CEO up there with the hat
on (make sure you clear it with him/her in advance) you will most
likely hit a big home run.
You might be good at folding newspaper into hats which would be fun. You could pick one of the characters in the crowd and fold
up a hat using the "Wall Street Journal" and say, "this is
as close as the information in the WSJ ever gets to Joe's head."
You can also get a chapeaugraphy hat http://www.chap-o.com
which is a brimless piece of felt that can be twisted into many funny hats.
from Tom Antion's
You can subscribe to his free newsletter 'Great Speaking'
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Comments or if have you a tip to share -
====> Play Talk
This one may be old and some of you may have seen it before, but having received it just when we were talking of play,
I couldn't resist including it .....
I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year-old
I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant.
I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make a sidewalk with rocks.
I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them.
I want to lie under a big oak tree and run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.
I want to return to a time when life was simple; When all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes, but that didn't
bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know and you didn't care.
All you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully unaware of
all the things that should make you worried or upset. I want to think the
world is fair. That everyone is honest and good.
I want to believe that anything is possible. I want to be oblivious to the
complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things again. I want to live simple again.
I don't want my day to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month
than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones.
I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams, the imagination, mankind, and making angels
in the snow.
So . . . here's my checkbook and my car-keys, my credit card bills. I am officially resigning from adulthood.
And if you want to discuss this further, you'll have to catch me first, cause........
===> More Play Talk
Last Saturday the administrative staff of Bethany High went for day out. The whole day was quite a load of fun, but the
best part was the games Akash (the principal) had for us on the bus.
We played a memory game - It goes this way ... A player starts by telling everyone his brother went abroad and brought
him a xxxxxx (eg pen). The next player has to repeat that entirely and then add another item. The 3rd person has to list item 1 and 2
and then add a third. The items have to be listed in the correct order. If you miss an item or name an incorrect item you're out.
We also played a story making game. We make a story with everyone contributing just one line. The catch - your entire
sentence should not have one letter that is taboo. (I wanted to have T as the taboo letter, thus making sure you can't use
'the', 'this', 'there' etc most of the common words. I was
outvoted and we settled on C as the taboo letter.
The highlight of the bus games was the last one. It was in full swing as we reached back to town. The game went
this way .... Akash started by saying his Aunt went to Japan and brought him a fan. As he said 'fan' he started swinging
his left hand in a fanning motion close to his face. Everyone
(one-by-one) had to follow suit, but the condition was, not to stop any motion that you had started. His aunt next
brought him a sewing machine, some chewing gum, a cycle and a tummy trimmer. Towards the end of this
game we were a sight to behold. 13 Adults in a School Bus, swaying both hands, making funny faces (chewing), swaying
and shaking. Not one of the 13 could stop laughing. And it was a silly game where no one could win or lose!!
My thoughts ... a) What would I have thought if I was outside watching these people, not knowing what was
happening in the bus.
b) THANK GOD! THE DRIVER IS NOT PLAYING !!!!
Hope you liked these games and will try them out. If you have any more fun games for us ... tell us and we'll
head off for another picnic! :-)
coz 7 days without a pun makes one weak
=========== This week's Humor ==========
It was the first day of school in Houston, and the teacher thought she'd get to know the kids by asking them their name and what
their father does for a living.
The first little girl said: "My name is Mary and my daddy is a postman." The next little boy said: "I'm Andy and my Dad is a
Then one little boy said: "My name is Jimmy, and my father is a strip tease dancer in a cabaret for gay men."
The teacher gasped and quickly changed the subject, but later in the school yard the teacher approached Jimmy privately and asked
if it was really true that his Dad danced nude in a gay bar.
He blushed and said, "No ma'am. The truth is, my dad is an auditor for Arthur Andersen, and I was just too embarrassed to say so."
(Thanks Shel Horowitz)
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