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Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg  mailto:eva@workinghumor.com

Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf   mailto:gunjan@workinghumor.com

13th November  2002    #     Issue 85
"Stand-up comedy is the one thing you can do badly
and no one will laugh at you."
~ www.stand-upcomedy.com


Moderator's No Comment -
                                             ~ Gunjan

The Other Moderator's Comment
                                             ~ Eva


                            ~ Tom Trottier

Speaking Tip
                              ~ from Tom Antion


Interruptions and Rules and  Zero
                    ~  Eva

Ideas to ponder over .... and Discuss
                             ~ Gunjan

Maybe they're not so bad after all
                            ~ Gunjan


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Interview with Moderator

Interviewer : Mr. Moderator we have heard that you
are working hard on becoming lazier by the day.
How would rate your progress.

Gunjan - Great

Interviewer : What have been the benefits? Are you happier ?
Are your LaughMates happier ? Could you tell us how it feels...
as you get lazier.

Gunjan - Good

Interviewer : That's wonderful that it feels good. I really like the concept
too. And your answers.... they are so inspiring ! I think I've got to learn
about this laziness stuff myself and start practising it too. Who would you
recommend as the teacher/coach?

Gunjan - God

Interviewer : Ah yes! That makes so much sense! Nothing better than
learning laziness the natural way. Thank you. Last question! Any ideas
where I should start?

Gunjan - Go
{Old Monopoly joke ;}

Interviewer : Would you mind signing the transcript of this interview,
so my boss knows its authentic.

Gunjan - g

Please, send any comments to:

The Other Moderator's Comment

Dear LaughMates,

Sitting here at my keyboard, following Gunjan's remarkably
brilliant and succinctly lazy opening, I am feeling too lazy
to think up anything funny.

We've finished our first week in our new 'office.'
Naturally, things are still in total chaos, as we try to get all
the equipment running, connected to the Internet and to
the other equipment on the premises.

We've spent so much time laughing, being happy and
goofing around. But I cannot recall one single, individual
funny incident. Does general joy count?

One interesting reversal of roles has taken place. When the
office was 'away,' I used to arrive in the morning to the
smell of fresh coffee. (Isn't that a wonderful scent, even
if you don't actually drink coffee?)

Now, when Lulu arrives, I have the coffee ready for her
to experience the luscious aroma.

Uh, we still need to get cookie dough, so we can fill
the house with the right aromas when people arrive.

Must run. Doing a live radio interview somewhere about
our divorce special. How do they keep finding us?

Your Comic Guide

Eva Rosenberg
http://taxmama.com   - 4 Secrets to Happy Tax Returns

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=====  Continuing Discussions  =====

=== > Reason why?

It doesn't seem that clear to me that 20 pages is worse than one.

Are the newspapers breathlessly waiting for it? Then speed is more
important. Circle what should be printed before copying.

Do the papers have be persuaded or cajoled? Or does the track meet
have press release standards or concerns? Then make the format more

Do the papers need colour? Then add descriptions and tales to each of
the 20 pages..."Carole was leading from the start, but Mahani caught up
in the last 10 metres and barely passed her at the wire. Heck, write a
whole story and include pix.

Papers use lots of paper. 1 vs 20 doesn't matter much, so long as it's
clear how to use the material.


Moderator's Comments - Thanks Tom. That's a great idea.
 >From next time we'll use the circling to highlight the important
bits and add the descriptions.

My problem was not in the number of sheets per se but the
amount of irrelevant information being sent along with the
relevant info. (Unfortunately I didn't think of the highlighting ....
and of course the other person didn't think at all from the user
point of view.) If she had come up with this solution I'd have
no problem with sending the 20 sheets.
~ Gunjan

Comments -

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=== > Speaking Tip

A good beginning makes a good ending
                                                   English Proverb

Introductions are a time to bring a speaker and audience together so
that the speaker can deliver a message to an audience who has been
made receptive. You must take control of your introductions if at all


Always write your own introduction, double space it, and print it in a
large, easily readable typestyle. Send it to your introducer well in advance
and bring extra copies with you to the presentation.

When preparing an introduction, use your name several times and also
name your subject. Give a reason for you being chosen as the speaker
and a few things about you that will cause the audience to feel you are
qualified to speak. Make sure benefits to the audience are apparent so
they know there is something to be gained from listening. Don't build
resistance by telling them how great you are.

Limit your qualifications to two or three items and use only the ones
that pertain to that group. I always like to insert a simple joke for the
introducer that teases me a little and gets the audience primed to laugh.
If possible, I use the same "test" humor each time I am introduced. The
amount of laughter I hear in response to this joke acts as a gauge to tell
me the degree to which the audience is in fun. Here's a sample of a typical
introduction I use.

                            THOMAS ANTION

Here with us today to talk about a lighter way to do business is 1{Tom
Antion}. Tom is the 2{author} of six books and is now working on his
seventh which is titled Business Lite: Humor, Effectiveness & The Bottom

Tom brings to us a 3{great depth of small business experience. He
owned an apartment rental business and a hotel before he graduated
from college. He currently owns four small businesses}. 4,5{His
consulting firm Antion & Associates helps companies & individuals
realize the great benefits associated with enthusiasm and
lightheartedness in the workplace}.

6{Tom is a frequent keynote speaker before all types of business &
civic groups}. 7{The last time he spoke, the audience was glued to
their seats. . . . Tom did this to make sure no one left}.

8,9{Here to help us discover a lighter and more profitable way to
manage our businesses} is Tom Antion 10{(lead enthusiastic applause)}

1. Name mentioned several times.
2. The word author means credibility.
3. Business experience means credibility.
4. Mentions availability to consult, plus establishes in the audience's
mind that you help other companies.
5. Benefits to audience.
6. Shows availability for other talks.
7. Easily delivered joke (gives them hope that NO ZZZZZs are forthcoming).
8. Subject.
9. Benefits to audience.
10. Reminds them to applaud.

~ Tom Antion

[This is an extract from Tom Antion's ebook Wake 'em Up.
You can get your own copy via

This extract is not from Tom Antion's Great Speaking
Newsletter. However the Newsletter has tons of great
tips too.

You can subscribe FREE to Tom's newsletter 'Great Speaking'
To subscribe why not use our affiliate link (given below) ]


Comments or if have you a tip to share -

=====  New Discussions  =====

====> Interruptions and Rules and  Zero

Dear LaughMates,

We all know that when we offer free services, we must set
boundaries for our members, or fans, otherwise, we'll never
get anything done.

Yesterday, despite all information on TaxMama.com that
free consultations are available via the site - but phone
consultations must be paid, I got another TaxMama call.
Being in a much more mellow mood since we moved into
the house, I was kind. (I remember! I used to be that way
all the time!)

And the man was not only totally gracious, but also interested
in hiring my services to do something that he didn't really need
me to do. There's a service I recommend on the site for folks
who are self-employed and married. It lets you take tax deductions
for all your medical expenses.

Apparently, they've changed hands from when I was actively
working with them. Their phone system now goes into
VoiceMail Hell.  He couldn't get past their phone system and
was willing to pay me to set this up for him.

While I like free money as much as the next Mate, that really
didn't seem right. Suggesting that he just bypass the whole
system and enter -0-, I thought he might reach his goal
without paying me $150.

He was so charmed with the concept....and of course, with the
incredibly clever and useful TaxMama.com, he's going to carry
the syndicated version of Ask TaxMama on his site and
refer his thousands of attorneys and business people to
become new members.

Oh heck, I suppose some interruptions are worth it.
What do you think? Have you brushed someone off
and lived to regret it?


Your Comic Guide,

Eva Rosenberg

P.S. He called. Hit -0- and got through.
I guess some of us old-timers remember dialing
O for operator, often the most useful person in the company.
Especially for salesmen. Best source of contacts and information
there was! VoiceMail has eradicated the operator quite effectively.

====> Thoughts to Ponder .... and discuss

Hi LaughMates,

With this issue I'd like to introduce this new section into
I-Laugh and carry not every week but once in every
2-3 issues.

What I'll be doing is using a little extract from somewhere
(It maybe from a famous book, a little known book from
a famous author, a speech or I might even try and bluff
you by bundling in my own or some other LaughMates stuff.)

The passage will have some interesting idea to ponder and
discuss (and it will also be a guessing game trying to guess
who wrote the passage or from where it is).

So ready for the first passage ? Here goes...

No fact is more firmly established than that lying is a necessity
of our circumstances--the deduction that it is then a Virtue goes
without saying. No virtue can reach its highest usefulness without
careful and diligent cultivation--therefore, it goes without saying
that this one ought to be taught in the public schools--even in the
newspapers. What chance has the ignorant uncultivated liar against
the educated expert? What chance have I against Mr. Per--against
a lawyer? _Judicious_ lying is what the world needs. I sometimes
think it were even better and safer not to lie at all than to lie
injudiciously. An awkward, unscientific lie is often as ineffectual
as the truth.

Guess who wrote/said this or from where it is taken

Share your thoughts on the subject

Isn't it high time your company had a training module on the
subject ? Or does it already have one ? ;-)


====> Maybe they're not so bad after all

Don't some people just get on your nerves? They don't
have to do anything to irritate you it's just something about
them that you don't like and it gets to you. Sometimes
you hardly know the person and yet they irk you.

Last night while reading "It was on fire when I lay down on it"
by Robert Fulghum I discovered a really cool idea that can help
battle the above problem. The book consists of short essays,
and I found this one in the essay about Geek (not Greek) Dancing.
He is talking first about Geeks, defining them the talking about
their dancing and I'm just thinking whether I should hop, skip
or whether I should jump to the next chapter when this line stops
me dead in my tracks ...

"When I see people like that on the street and start to look
down my nose at them, a better voice in my head says
'probably dancers' and I feel better about them."

What a cool idea.... I love stamp collectors (especially the ones
who have an idea of how much to talk about their collections and
when to stop) for instance. So next time this person jumps the
queue and barges in front of me at the supermarket all I have to
do is imagine that he is a stamp collector and has just been told
that 'The Penny Black' is being auctioned on eBay. No wonder
the poor chap is in such hurry !!

"God speed to you my friend ! "



Click: The Ultimate Guide to Electronic Marketing for
Speakers, Authors, Coaches and Consultants...by Tom Antion

A breakthrough e-book which will show you how to build an
electronic marketing business from "square one" into a
five-figure . . . six figure . . . even a million dollar asset.

Adds Tom Antion "I don't have a tremendous amount of
basic computer knowledge. The technical stuff doesn't even
interest me. . . .
I like to write deposit slips, not programs.
I do know where to "click" to make money and this E-book
was designed to make it easy for you to click in the right place.

Adds Gunjan "Start by Clicking here" :-)

===========  This week's Humor ==============

(In the last 3 years that I've been running humorous ezines
I must have come across this one atleast 10 times. And yet
it never ceases to amuse me .... especially problem and
solution 3 ! ;-)

Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints by
QANTAS pilots and the corrective action recorded by

P = the problem the pilots entered in the log.
S = the solution or corrective action taken by the mechanics.

P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for!

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed radar with words.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

Comments :


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