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Your Working Humor Discussion List

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I-Laugh - Your 'Working' Humor Discussion List
---------------------------------------------

Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg  mailto:eva@workinghumor.com

Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf   mailto:gunjan@workinghumor.com

http://workinghumor.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
22nd January  2003    #     Issue 95
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
--Arthur C. Clarke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

IN THIS DIGEST   :

Moderator's Comment -
                                                  ~ Gunjan

The Other Moderator's Comment
                                                   ~ Eva
_____________________

CONTINUING DISCUSSIONS

How old
                       ~ JD Lentz
                       ~ PK Jha

Pollen our Legs
                        ~ Uncle Joe

Ideas to ponder over .... and Discuss
                                ~ Gunjan

Speaking Tip (You can do Magic)
                                   ~ from Tom Antion

NEW DISCUSSIONS

Do you have a fixed signature ?
               ~ Gunjan

How swiftly do you move ?
               ~ Gunjan

THIS WEEK'S HUMOR

THIS WEEK'S STRESS RELIEVER
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Moderator's Comments
-------------------------------------------------

Dear Laughmates,

Did you watch the golden globe awards this week? What
a performance by .... Uuuummmm .... Nicole .... Uuuummmm
.... Kidman.

I started to feel sorry for her and thought that we Laughmates
should pool in and send her Tom Antion's 'Wake 'em Up' kit.
Then my thoughts turned to the sound editors in her movies. Boy,
do they..... Uuuummmm .... (snip) have a .... Uuuummmm ....
(snip) lousy job ! ;-)

Well that's enough kidding ... I've just received a telegram from
Eva which reads - "Begin worrying. Details to follow."

Well, since that not her message for all of you ... you go ahead
and enjoy yourself with the rest of I-Laugh #95

With best wishes,
Gunjan
Many a true word is spoken in Jest
--------------------------------------
Jest for Pun - pun-subscribe@topica.com
Jest a Quote - quote-subscribe@topica.com
Jest in Literature (A) - lit-subscribe@topica.com

P

P.P.S - Please invite your friends to subscribe by sending an email to:
64841-subscribe@zinester.com


Please, send any comments to:
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=Comments

----------
The Other Moderator's Comment
----------

Dear LaughMates,

Please ask Gunjan to stop picking on me! ;~)

This is a very frustrating week, albeit filled with
gales of (hysterical) laughter, as my assistant and I
come face to face with just how much we rely on the
Internet in our day-to-day work. With our DSL connection
down for this week until we get new service, everytime
we reach over to look something up, check on appointments,
try to find an IRS form, or send a note to a client...
well... Even Lulu, who spends NO time online goofing off
or getting lost in websites, has come to realize just
how much of her work she is able to accomplish via the
Internet connection.

Anyway...if you sent me any notes, please don't expect a
speedy reply this week. All I have is this little dial-up
machine, away from my phones, tools and notes. So I am
only checking in once or twice a day. For client emergencies.

And speaking of shocking (we were, weren't we?). My husband
got a solicitation from Sears, offering him 10% discount on
anything in the store. Those of you know of him know that
he's an avid tool surfer and will find any excuse to hang
out in the Sears dungeon, happily surrounded by the smells
and textures of the power and hand tools.

Well, the come-on for the discount was that you get that
10% coupon validated if you come in and have H&R Block
prepare your tax return. I just laughed and laughed...until...
Oh my gosh! He's thinking about it!!!!!

And on that note, I'm off...literally.

Have a wonderful week. I'll miss you all.

Your Comic Guide,

Eva Rosenberg
http://taxmama.com   - 4 Secrets to Happy Tax Returns
http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/prod.aspx?p=supertaxmama.2512425
Online Gambling Tax Mysteries
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=====  CONTINUING DISCUSSIONS ========

===> How Old

I mulled this line about how old I would be if I didn't know
how old I was until I completely lost track of time, and now
I don't know what day it is either.

The Doc (JD Lentz)
JEST in LITERATURE!
lit-subscribe@topica.com (For Adults Only)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
While this one really has more to do with Generation Gap than
with Age, I still think it is worth sharing here :

"By the time I was old enough to realise that my father
was right, my son was old enough to disagree with me."

-- Paddy
(P.K.Jha)

Please, send any comments to:
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=HowOld

===> Pollen our Legs

Now you have told us that Gunjan translates to 'the buzzing of
the bees' I have been combing my mind for comments. I hive to
say one thought did enter, but hexagon as quickly as it arrived.
So long as you're not pollen our legs.

Chacha Joe
www.smilepoetryweekly.com

Moderator's Comment - I would have loved to be pollen your legs
but I wasn't at the right angle. You've to be careful of
circular hives or you mess up the bee pi.

Please, send any comments to:
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=Pollenourlegs

===> Ideas to ponder over .... and Discuss

Ian Anderson at one his shows introduced a song by saying...
"Let's see if we can spot the over 25s in the audience."

Well if you heard today's extract straight from the poet who
wrote it .... you're well over 250 !! ;-)

The Extract
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The mind is its own place, and in it self
Can make a Heav'n of Hell, a Hell of Heav'n.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Guess who wrote/said this or from where it is taken
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=guess

I believe very firmly in the above thought. How do
you feel about it. Agree, disagree, or want to share
any thoughts - drop them right here ...

mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=mind

Gunjan

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=== > Speaking Tip

STRANGE OCCURRANCES by Tom Antion


OK, OK, I know I've been preaching for years the fact that you
should always use humor to make a point in a presentation. Well
sometimes I don't do that at all.

Sometimes I might just do something to create a buzz. -- Just to
give people something to talk about after they leave my
presentation. These things I do easily could be used to make a
point if I wanted to, but I don't always want to.

HERE'S AN EXAMPLE:

Do you think you might tell someone about it if you saw me speak
and you witnessed with your very own eyes a handkerchief flying
100 feet across the meeting room right into my hand?

You can make that happen for about $80.00

Not that there is any point here, but I do need a reason that the
handkerchief decided to fly over to me. I set that up by saying,
"It seems to be getting a little hot in here." Now it makes sense
for me to summon a handkerchief to wipe my brow. I then put it in
my lapel pocket and continue as if nothing happened.

I don't really continue . . . I pretend to continue until people
start yelling, "How'd you do that?" I respond as if I don't know
what they are talking about and play that out for a while. I
never do tell them.

HERE'S ANOTHER ONE:

How about pouring water on someone's head and they don't get wet?
You can do that too for about ten bucks.

Am I going to tell you how the above things are done? Absolutely
not! Someone from the magician's union would kill me. You can
however, take this article to a magic shop and tell them you want
to be able to do these things and they will sell you the
appropriate equipment / supplies. Once you've purchased, then you
have the right to know how it works. That's the way it works with
magic. Don't go into the store and ask them how to do this,
because they won't tell you. YOU MUST PURCHASE FIRST and there
are no refunds, so be prepared to either go through with these
tricks or throw them in a drawer.

I will tell you, that these two tricks take minimum practice, but
they DO TAKE SOME PRACTICE. Don't go off and try to use them in a
presentation the moment you get them or you're guaranteed to mess
up. -- and messing up the water trick will get YOU in hot water
with the person you just soaked. :)

from Tom Antion's Great Speaking Newsletter

You can subscribe FREE to Tom's newsletter 'Great Speaking'
To subscribe why not use our affiliate link (given below) ]

http://www.listpartners.com/cgi-local/subscribe?2606

Comments or if have you a tip to share -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=speakertips

==========  NEW DISCUSSIONS ===========

====>  Fixed Signatures

Hi Laughmates,

Do you have a fixed signature and do you attach it to every mail
that you send out irrelevant to what you are sending out ?

Last week I got a copy of a mail in which a person was explaining
why his service has broken down, apologising it for it, and hoping
that this wouldn't break his relationship with the person whom he
was writing to. The signature .... If you want to recommend our
services we have an affiliate program blah blah blah.

I nearly fell off my chair laughing. The person to whom you are
profusely apologising and saying please don't drop me is hardly
going to be in the frame of mind to recommend your service
at present. In fact, if the person receiving the letter doesn't
realize that this is your fixed signature, or doesn't have much
of a sense humor, the line could be rather offending wouldn't
you say ??

So please do remember to double check, change and even
erase your signatures as and when necessary.

Best,
Gunjan

Comments  -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=signatures

===> At what speed do you move ?

Hi Laughmates,

Any of you signed up with Laughmate Stephanie Allen's
discussion group on New Thought Marketing? Her group
maybe small but it's starting to read like the Who's who
roster on the net.

On that list there was a little chat happening! One of the
members - Josh Hinds of www.getmotivation.com was at
the Sundance Film Festival. While at the Festival he's been
"taking the opportunity to stick as many "GetMotivation.com"
sized post cards into the hands of passers by".

I was just thinking what a great idea this is ... and why don't I
try it out too. More than with www.workinghumor.com it should
be a roar with the puns/limericks from www.jestforpun.com

While I was still pondering whether I should try it out, whether I
should do immediately, etc I see the next post from Rick Beneteau
of www.MakeYourSuccess.com asking Josh if he can courier
some cards to him.

That's some pace these guys move at !! What speed do you move at?
(I think I'll need to streamline my shape if I'm going to even try to
move at those speeds ;-)

~ Gunjan

Comments -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=speed

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Click: The Ultimate Guide to Electronic Marketing for
Speakers, Authors, Coaches and Consultants...by Tom Antion

A breakthrough e-book which will show you how to build an
electronic marketing business from "square one" into a
five-figure . . . six figure . . . even a million dollar asset.

Adds Tom Antion "I don't have a tremendous amount of
basic computer knowledge. The technical stuff doesn't even
interest me. . . .
I like to write deposit slips, not programs.
I do know where to "click" to make money and this E-book
was designed to make it easy for you to click in the right place.

Adds Gunjan "Start by Clicking here" :-)
http://snurl.com/click
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

===========  This week's Humor ==============

Following our 'discussion' on spam last week here are some tips
on identifying chain letters and what to do with them ....

FROM: laocoon@d...
TO: all
SB: Greeks bearing gifts

WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! IF YOU RECEIVE A
GIFT IN THE SHAPE OF A LARGE WOODEN HORSE DO
NOT DOWNLOAD IT!!!! It is EXTREMELY DESTRUCTIVE
and will overwrite your ENTIRE CITY!

The "gift" is disguised as a large wooden horse about two stories tall.
It tends to show up outside the city gates and appears to be abandoned.

DO NOT let it through the gates! It contains hardware that is
incompatible with Trojan programming, including a crowd of heavily
armed Greek warriors that will destroy your army, sack your town,
and kill your women and children. If you have already received such
a gift, DO NOT OPEN IT! Take it back out of the city unopened
and set fire to it by the beach. FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!

Poseidon

-----
FROM: hector@s...
TO: laocoon@d...
RE: Greeks bearing gifts

Laocoon,

I hate to break to you, but this is one of the oldest hoaxes there is.

I've seen variants on this warning come through on other listservs, one
involving some kind of fruit that was supposed to kill the people who
ate it and one having to do with something called the "Midas Touch."

Here are a few tipoffs that this is a hoax:

1) This "Forward this message to everyone you know" crap. If it were
really meant as a warning about the Greek army, why tell anyone to post
it to the Phonecians, Sumerians, and Cretans?

2) Use of exclamation points. Always a giveaway.

3) It's signed "from Poseidon." Granted he's had his problems with
Odysseus but he's one of their guys, isn't he? Besides, the lack of a
real header with a detailed address makes me suspicious.

4) Technically speaking, there is no way for a horse to overwrite your
entire city. A horse is just an animal, after all.

Next time you get a message like this, just delete it. I appreciate your
concern, but once you've been around the block a couple times you'll
realize how annoying this kind of stuff is.

Bye now,

Hector

Comments :
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=humor

===========  This week's Stress Reliever  ==============

This digital clock should keep you ticking...

http://yugop.com/ver3/stuff/03/fla.html

(Thanks Lars Hanson)

Comments or Submissions of your own favorites:
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=lolurl

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I

I-Laugh is edited by:
Eva Rosenberg mailto:eva@workinghumor.com

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