Your Working Humor Discussion List
I added the Herby story in the april fools, section,
the welcome to the new advertisers in your comments
and my comments, which you are free to cut shorter
I-Laugh - Your 'Working' Humor Discussion List
Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg mailto:email@example.com
Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org
9th April 2003 # Issue 106
You don't have to fool all the people all of the time; you just have to
enough to get elected. ~ Gerald Barzan
IN THIS DIGEST :
Moderator's Comment -
The Other Moderator's Comment
~ Dr. Stan's Prank
~ from Tom Antion
IDEAS TO PONDER AND DISCUSS
~ Willem Schultink
~ Madhatter's Comment
~ David Leonhardt
~ More Madhatter Comments
~ Uncle Joe (Harris)
THIS WEEK'S HUMOR
THIS WEEK'S STRESS RELIEVER
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"I have changed the light bulb."
The above statement is my way of indulging in some
wishful thinking. If you're wondering what I'm talking
about, take a peek at the humor for the week section
and hopefully you might have a clue to what I'm up to.
Do remember to hop back and check out the rest of
I-Laugh #106 too.
If you are back would you please tell me if any of you
used to check out our daily business cartoons regularly ?
I just noticed
yesterday that the feed was not working. I have no idea
how long it was dead and I'm trying to find out. If you
used to check it out and stopped when you started
seeing the same cartoon everyday please drop a
and add the approximate date when you noticed this.
Of course it HAS been set right and is working beautifully again !
We'd like to welcome our newest advertiser to support I-Laugh.
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With best wishes,
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The Other Moderator's Comment
Doncha just love those cartoons?
I've always loved reading them...have (had?) aspirations of
creating them. In fact, I've even bought some URLs in case
I have time for the project. (Serenata has the BEST caricature
skills - and she's ready to create anytime I'm ready to write.)
Wouldn't it be wonderful to be paid to do nothing by write and
create, with no stress, no reliance on other people getting you
things...just play with your imagination and get paid to have fun.
Oh, isn't that what most of you do? Never mind. You've
already got it right. ;~)
Well, this week, I finally got my act together and finished the
Secrets book - you know, the one about the 10 businesses you
can start online without one thin dime?
Now, it's in Serenata's hands to format the book and make it
pretty in time for AF2003 - http://affiliateforce2003.com/
I think I'll arrange to give a free copy to everyone who attends.
Many of you have been so wonderful, providing input, ideas
and even content. Everyone who did, or who provided
testimonials, will also be sent a free copy. And if you want
to help market it through the affiliate program we are setting up,
you will be started out at a higher commission rate than everyone
else. You're going to love the book.
Getting it done had me working through most of the night Monday.
Somewhere close to 3:00 a.m., I finally made it to bed.
But, I'd promised my husband that I'd get up Tuesday morning,
with him, and make his lunch.
So, bright (dark) and early, at 4:00 a.m. he rubs my back, kisses me
and asks, "So, are you up?" Naturally, I reply, "Sure. Want
Rick says, "Yup." and goes off to the shower.
Me? I slowly get up, go to the kitchen, and make the sandwich and
pack the lunch, with my eyes closed....
Rick? As he's ready to leave, he comes back to the bed, kisses me
goodbye and chuckles.
I finally wake up at 5:30 a.m., only to realize that I never had gotten
up at 4:00 - and just a few minutes later, Rick called to see if I was
up - laughing. "Oh, so you finally woke up, did you?"
Seems, I'd been domestic, only in my dreams. He now has more fuel
to tease me for weeks to come.
Have you ever thought you'd done something, only to realize you'd
been doing it in your dreams? Or been awakened, done something
and were completely unaware when you woke up?
(Ah, but that's another story...)
Your Comic Guide,
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===== CONTINUING DISCUSSIONS ========
===> April Fool
I told my mother I totaled my truck on the highway.
Redondo Beach CA
===> April Fool
The best gag that I played was to reset the autocorrect
feature in Microsoft Word on a friends computer. I'd got
the idea from www.computerpranks.com
but instead of
following their instructions to the letter and filling in big,
dirty words, my changes were minor. He became her, the
became then, but became butt.
I was lucky enough to be able to watch her as she started
to use her comp after my fiendish touch to it. For the first
3-4 lines that she typed, she didn't even notice. It was when
she came to it and it became s*it (with symbol et al) that
she realized that something was wrong. After fiddling with
s*it for a few more minutes and a few more lines she called the
system administrator whose instant reaction was ... Word has
got corrupt. Let's reinstall it. I tried to wink at the system
administrator, signal to her that it was a gag and that she was
ruining it, but she just didn't catch on.
So, I decided the prank was over and told my friend to type
her name in ... which got corrected to "Gotcha! Happy
All Fool's Day!!" (which left the system administrator very
confused, but that's another story.)
My gag which flopped miserably was the one that...
It makes me cry to think how badly it flopped. <Sob>
I'll come back to it later ...
The best gag played on me was the one played by The Doc.
He forwarded me that piece that was titled "The Burning Bush". O
n the one hand I couldn't believe it was genuine...especially since
it was dated 2003. Heck, Bush has been screaming for blood since
the beginning of Feb (remember the inspectors were supposed to
report to the UN on Valentines day, but war rhetoric was already
thick in the air) so how could this Fiji conference and anti-war
speech have been delivered this year. That would be too sudden
and too drastic a turn about, even for a politician.
On the other hand, The Doc doesn't just forward anything
unless he has verified its authenticity, etymology and
iconology so maybe the 2003 was a typo. I spent almost
two hours at Google trying to find some other record of this
conference (and its correct date). I searched for Fiji Conference,
Fiji Summit, Plenary Session, President Bush's Peace Speech
(The google logo seemed to smile at that one), Inaugural Global
Peace Imagination Summit, and the above keywords in
I even tried copying and pasting keyphrases from the speech,
but to no avail. Finally, worried that Google might mistake me
for a hacker trying to jam their engine with continuous queries
I wrote to Doc ... saying I can't find any other mention of this
session or speech anywhere. Is it authentic. Could he answer
quick as I'd like to use the piece in I-Laugh if it was authentic.
Here is his reply...
"Well, apparently he's (Bush) planning on being the same fool in
as he has been during the other months of the year. But, one can always
hope there's a parallel universe where on this day, those who have
been fools during the rest of the year actually have a sane day.
Oh Boy ... Had I been Had !?!
After I recovered from the shock of discovering how neatly
I could be taken, I thought I'll play the same gag on all my
Laughmates. So I posted the letter exactly as I received it.
That my friends brings me back to the gag which flopped
miserably. Yes, its this same one that I played on all of you.
Why do I feel it flopped ? Not a single comment about it. Not
a single mail doubting the authenticity of that post. (It's no fun
making someone say Uncle if they'll say Uncle without a fuss ! ;-)
See how the same gag can be the best gag played on one person
and the worst played on another !!
==> April Fool
This was recd from Dr. Stan Kegel...
As many of you know, each year the Internet must be shut down for
24 hours in order to allow us to clean it. The cleaning process, which
eliminates dead email and inactive ftp, www and gopher sites, allows
for a better working and faster Internet.
This year, the cleaning process will take place from 12:01 a.m.. GMT
on April 1st until 12:01 a.m, GMT on April 2nd During that 24-hour
period, five powerful Internet search engines situated around the world
will search the Internet and delete any data that they find.
In order to protect your valuable data from deletion we ask that you
do the following:
1. Disconnect all terminals and local area networks from their Internet
2. Shut down all Internet servers, or disconnect them from the Internet.
3. Disconnect all disks and hard drives from any connections to the
4. Refrain from connecting any computer to the Internet in any way.
We understand the inconvenience that this may cause some Internet users,
and we apologize. However, we are certain that any inconveniences will
be more than made up for by the increased speed and efficiency of the
Internet, once it has been cleared of electronic flotsam and jetsam.
We thank you for your cooperation.
Interconnected Network Maintenance staff,
Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Please notify your friends relatives and business associates on this
event so they too will be prepared.
Thank God (Evolution ? ;) for making me smart enough to not fall
for this one !
==> Really Great April Fool's Prank
Those of you who read Monday's HelpDesk already know about this.
But here's the best and most lucrative prank of the year:
Get Your Logos on Carnival Cruise Ships - For FREE
OK my friends, I don't know who all signed up for iAfma,
or upgraded to Gold, to get a double-sized logo, based on
my comments. But, I hope you've got a good sense of humor.
According to Herby, over 70 people stepped up to get the
logos, about 8 signed up for the cruise and a few people
upgraded their iAfma memberships to gold.
It was an April Fool's joke.
Naturally, he put clues into his detailed letter. An obvious
one was the name of the Carnival contact, Loof Lirpa . Uh, it's
obvious, now that we look back. Some people caught on right
away - or say they did.
At the time I read the letter, I thought, wow! Herby IS amazing,
but wouldn't this be funny if it turned out to be a gag? (Do
you think my voicing that made it so? <g>)
I LOVE a good, harmless, practical joke!
I hope you enjoyed the best April Fool's joke of all.
And I do hope to see you at AffiliateForce2003
There will be more pranks and fun in store - for all.
Your Comic Guide and AffiliateForce2003 speaker
=== > Speaking Tip
SOUND EFFECTS by Tom Antion
Making noises on stage just for fun or to represent your concept
is a way to get some laughs from the audience.
To get people's attention I use a thing called a "rubber razzer"
that makes a funny sound when you blow in one end. Sometimes
I use an electronic horn from Radio Shack that plays short segments
from 60 different recognizable tunes. In the old days I used a
train whistle which always got a chuckle.
Most recently I use a .wav file that I keep on the desktop of my
laptop. I tell the audience how I use Internet marketing
techniques to bring email orders into my inbox. I've set my
Outlook email program to recognize an order and go ka ching, ka
ching, ka ching, ka ching which, of course, is representative of
the cash register ringing. It always gets a laugh.
You can buy sound effect CDs at just about any major computer
store, or you can search in any major search engine for sound
effects files which you can download and use according to the
permission granted by the site.
Think about any of your concepts that could be represented by a
sound and you'll have a very easy way to add some humor to your
From Tom Antion's newsletter 'Great Speaking'
To subscribe why not use our affiliate link (given below) ]
Comments or if have you a tip to share -
===== IDEAS TO PONDER AND DISCUSS ========
===> Smart God
Ouch! The Doc sure got a dose of sarcasm! He wasn't even polite
enough to let God have a capital at the beginning of his name, like
he has for himself. *
At the end of his article he asks the question: >So, hey,
I got this curiosity thing going then? Huh?< To which the
is obvious - you were made with curiosity, and you should be asking
questions. No problem - except that your mind is so closed that you
won't consider the possibility that God made it all. You will not ask
the questions of evolutionary theory that show up its weaknesses.
Like how come complex organisms suddenly show up in the fossil
record with no intermediate forms?
Just think about this - what if God did actually make it in six days.
What if you used your curiosity to find out how he did it. Then you
would find out how the world actually works. And you wouldn't
waste your time trying to chase other ideas that are ultimately a
dead end street.
If you were to honestly compare creation and evolutionary theory
side by side as two hypotheses to see which best fit the evidence,
then you would have something to say. That's the only way in which
we can to scientific justice to this matter. Its simple - Just plug the
evidence into each hypothesis and see. Are you game?
(* Moderator's Comment - the doc hadn't signed that letter.
So the Capital letters in His ... sorry his name were put in
by me not by the doc.)
===> Smart God
You have it all wrong. Plants don't create seeds to reproduce
themselves ... seeds create plants to reproduce themselves.
The Happy Guy
http://TheHappyGuy.com ; http://happyguy.MYUW.biz
Kick-start your day with "Your Daily Dose of Happiness"
(Moderator's Comment - Check
for a debate on a similar topic)
[ The book that has triggered off this discussion is...
The Selfish Gene - http://snurl.com/sgene]
=========== NEW DISCUSSIONS ===========
===> Grand Prix
Did I tell you of my involvement in the shooting of the film Grand Prix
(with James Garner) at Brands Hatch? My main task was to get the
crowds along to fill the stands.
Needless to say despite the involvement of the highly successful local
newspaper group and the Daily Mail (a national) the numbers turning
up were less than John Frankenheimer had planned for. You may note
if you see the film that the shots with crowds are very tight in the
One of the attractions was a draw for a Mini Cooper, a highly desireable
soft top conversion of the high selling Mini at that time. The winner
out to be a rather scruffy and gangly teenager.
My boss (truly a gentleman and one of the nicest people I have known)
was rather disturbed by this. "Why didn't you arrange a more suitable
winner?" he asked.
Tell me. Had he instructed me beforehand to 'arrange the winner' should
I have done so?
Smile Poetry Weekly (fortnightly)
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Adds Tom Antion "I don't have a tremendous amount of
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interest me. . . .
I like to write deposit slips, not programs.
I do know where to "click" to make money and this E-book
was designed to make it easy for you to click in the right place.
Adds Gunjan "Start by Clicking here" :-)
=========== This week's Humor ==============
Question: How many E Mail List Subscribers
does it take to change a light bulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post to the mail
list that the light bulb has been changed.
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs
and how the light bulb could have been changed
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.
27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about
changing light bulbs.
53 to flame the spell checkers
106 to write to the list administrator complaining about
the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to
this mail list.
41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames.
99 to post that this list is not about light bulbs and to
please take this email exchange to private email
113 to demand that cross posting to other mail lists
about changing light bulbs be stopped.
101 to defend the posting to this list saying that we
all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are**
relevant to this mail list.
156 to debate which method of changing light bulbs
is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what
brand of light bulbs work best for this technique,
and what brands are faulty.
27 to post URLs where one can see examples of
different light bulbs
14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly,
and to post corrected URLs.
3 to post about links they found from the URLs that
are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant
to this list.
33 to concatenate all posts to date, then quote them
including all headers and footers, and then add
12 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing
because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.
19 to quote the "Me Too's" to say, "Me Three."
4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.
1 to propose a new "Lite Bulb Changing" Mail List.
47 to say this is just what the Mail List was meant for
123 votes for the new Mail List`
=========== This week's Stress Reliever ==============
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