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Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg  mailto:eva@workinghumor.com

Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf   mailto:gunjan@workinghumor.com

10th September 2003    #     Issue 128
"Anyone can be elected governor. I'm proof of that."
~ Joe Frank Harris, two-term Georgia Governor


Moderator's Comment -
                                                            ~ Gunjan


                                            ~ Gunjan

                                          ~ Uncle Joe
                                          ~ Willem
                                          ~ Moderator's Comment

                                                  ~ Uncle Joe

A different kind of Blasphemy
                                            ~ Gunjan

Comment on last Week's Humor for the week
                                            ~ Uncle Joe

Speaking Tip
                                          ~ from Tom Antion


A Public Letter to Uncle Joe



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Moderator's Comments

Dear LaughMates,

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With no further ado here's I-Laugh #128.

With best wishes
Many a true word is spoken in Jest
Jest for Pun - pun-subscribe@topica.com
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Jest in Literature (A) - lit-subscribe@topica.com


P.P.S - Please invite your friends to subscribe by sending an email to:

Please, send any comments to:

Oscar Wilde was the master of the studied insult. His jabs
at hypocrisy, pretense, and boring conventionality still have
a penetrating power. His snubs and put-downs became the
talk of his time, no less by his targets than by Oscar Wilde
himself. This collection features over 750 biting comments...



=== > Challenges !

Hi Laughmates,

I don't think many of you followed the link to
http://workinghumor.com/selling_humor.shtml  ?
or from there to the google adsense
"Car Salesman Breakthrough" ad. What I was trying to point
was the testimonials are so neat they look as if they've been
written by professional writers. Sure they may be genuine ...
and the person has clients who write that well, but personally
I'll prefer testimonials like -
any day. What do you think?

BTW, I'd love to have some testimonials from those of
you who enjoy I-Laugh.


=== > Mor'on Challenges !

Dear Laughmates,

Nobody seemed to have noticed the goof up I
made with this post ...

> M'ars will be so close that deodorants will be futile !
> ~ Gunjan
> Many a true word is spoken in Jest
> --------------------------------------
> Jest for Pun - pun-subscribe@topica.com

What I found embareassing the moment I'd hit the
send button was the signature. It may be catchy and
very appropriate in some cases ... but in this case made
me sound like an exceptionally stinky guy !


~ Gunjan

Comments -

===> Eco Bull?


Uncle Joe

===> Eco Bull?

Hi, Gunjan!

I can see that I'm going to get myself in trouble again, talking
about serious matters in a humour forum! But then, you're the
one that raises them! I just hope you don't let the cows out!

'Mankind' is certainly a generic term that includes all of the
human race. It is always used that way and is almost never
used to refer to the male of the species exclusively.
Thus 'mankind' refers to all of us.

The term 'womankind', however, refers to the female of the
species exclusively, and is therefore effectively a subset of

This should not surprise us, because God created Adam
first, and then He created Eve from Adam. And it is as a
result of Adam's rebellion against God (and not Eve's)
that we are in the trouble and mess we're in, in this world.

This does not make women in any way inferior to men,
because God created both men and women in His own
image. Which is a pretty high value! Thus both men and
women are of equal value, though they have different roles
to play.


With regard to the bees and aggression and all of that:

About 5 or 6 years ago we were visiting friends with the
family. We were just getting out of the car, with kids
everywhere, when our friends' German Shepherd dog
attacked our three year old girl. My wife moved like
lightning, much quicker than me. I tell you, she was not
gentle with the dog. Fierce is perhaps the best way of
describing it. Fortunately, the damage was minor. It was
the protective instinct of the mother kicking in very strongly
that saved our daughter from any serious injury.

There has been a lot written over the years about women
being kind and loving and gentle and guys being aggressive
always wanting to attack. All you need to do is watch a
father with his children to see how wrong this is. A father
whose child is hurt cares for him with just as much love
as a mother does, though he expresses it differently. If you
don't believe me, go down to your local park and watch
the families there for a while. And, as I have shown above,
a mother can be as fiercely protective of her children as a
father can, though she expresses it differently.

I could say a lot more about this, but I'm worried the cows
might get out!


Clarity! Simplicity! Speed!
willemzz design
In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth

Moderator's Comment - Willem, great to see you realise,
that you could get in trouble by raising serious issues (or
more importantly, for speaking seriously on serious issues)
at a humor forum. However, don't pass the blame on to me...
The whole idea that we're working on by bringing in serious
issues is to see how lightly we can discuss them. This will
reduce ones chances of getting fired while discussing
evolution/creation with one's boss ;)

Moving on to the bees and dogs stories (the birds must be
wondering about this strange twist in the tale); there's
a slight difference (just as slight as the difference between
manslaughter and 2nd degree murder) between instinctive
reactions and actions where you have the chance to think
before acting.

Did your wife insist that the German Shepherd be
put to sleep after the incident ? That in my opinion
would be a better comparison with bees example.
~ Gunjan

Comments  -

=== > Lessons !


I've put your name forward for the award of
the Golden Foot, popularly known as the gobstopper.

Chacha Joe
For a site of laughs and a FREE ezine:
For cricket lovers everywhere:
Batty Balls and other Wicket Wit

Moderator's Comment : Ouch !

Comments -

=== > Comment on Last Week's Humor !

> It is called the "C-Nile Virus."

Now look here, Gunjan, I'm fed up with --
(where did I put...  Oh!   OH!). It seems that just
because one drops off to...

Now, where was I? Oh yes. Uncle Joe and I
have had a conference on this, and just as soon as
I remember where we are meeting I'll give you our
response.  The brief I prepared for it is attached.

But do please remember that grey hair should
encourage respect, and no hair - wonder. So
before you challenge our memories answer me this:
can you talk for half an hour on the battle of

Chacha Joe
For a site of laughs and a FREE ezine:
For cricket lovers everywhere:
Batty Balls and other Wicket Wit

Moderator's comments : Sure. Here's the story
Batoo, the blind bat, whose tail was snipped off
by farmer Joe...

Want the  full story, or will you take my word
for it that I can speak for half an hour, on the
Bat Tail Off. ;)

Comments -

===> Speaking Tip

Saver Lines

Saver Lines are what you say when your supposedly
humorous statement does not get a laugh. You shouldn't
be ashamed to have to use saver lines. The top comedians
in the world need them and some purposely make mistakes
so they can get a laugh from the saver line. Johnny Carson
was an expert at this. After a poor response to a joke he
would say a comically insulting line like, "May an aroused
herd of Yaks make an everlasting commitment to your sister"
or "This is the kind of crowd that would watch Bambi through
a sniper scope." When it comes to saver lines there are two
schools of thought:

THE FIRST SCHOOL OF THOUGHT is used more by comics
and speakers who use a very high percentage of humor. This
method is most effective when a speaker shows a high confidence
level and is fairly experienced. Say a witty, mildly attacking line to
force them to laugh after they didn't laugh at your joke or one-liner.

    Do any of you out there speak English?

    I've got a book for sale outside that explains these jokes.
       You may want to pick up a copy.

    (If one person is laughing) Will you be kind enough to run
       around the room so it looks like everyone is having fun?

    You have marvelous self-control.

    I've got 20 more bad jokes just like that one and no one
       gets out until you start laughing.

    [Pick out a well-known person in the crowd] Joe that's the
       last time I'm using one of your jokes.

    I know you're out there, I can hear you breathing.

    I'm not going to wait forever for you.

    I was waiting on you a little on that one.

    That was a Polaroid joke. It takes one minute to get it.

    Everyone doesn't have to be funny all the time and I just proved it.

THE SECOND SCHOOL OF THOUGHT is used by less experienced
speakers and speakers who don't use much humor anyway.
If you don't use a high percentage of humor, the audience may not
realize what you said was meant to be funny. All you have to do is
keep right on talking and delivering your message (do give them
that short pause we talked about to give them a chance to laugh).
As long as your humor is making a point, you will be forgiven if it
is not tremendously funny.

~ from Tom Antion's ebook - Wake 'em Up
Get your copy at http://snurl.com/wakeup]

Tom Antion has a great newsletter called 'Great Speaking'
To subscribe why not use our affiliate link (given below) ]


Comments or if have you a tip to share -

=========== NEW DISCUSSIONS ===========

===> A Public Letter to Uncle Joe

Hi Chacha Joe,

I have just been reading a book by Dave Barry.

['Dave Barry is not taking this sitting down'
The title, explains Barry, was chosen so that they
could put a toilet on the cover. But I digress.]

In the very first chapter Dave starts ...

So there I was, sitting under the hot lights, when suddenly
Vicki Lawrence leaped to her feet and started yelling at me
about the death penalty. This happened in Los Angeles, on
the TV Show 'Politically Incorrect'. People yell a lot on that

I was on Politically Incorrect because I was on a book
tour. You go on whatever show they tell you to go on,
in hopes that the host will at some point hold your book
up to the camera, causing consumers all over America
to rush to bookstores to purchase it. You will basically do
ANYTHING (emphasis mine) to get your book on TV.
For example, a few days earlier, I let a total stranger
commit a major act of gel on my hair. This was on
'The Today Show' in New York. I was sitting in the
make up room, drinking coffee, trying to wake up,
and the makeup person after studying my head, called
the hair person over, pointed at my hair, and said:
"See? This is exactly what I was talking about."

Then they both laughed, and the hair person, before
I knew what was happening, applied 37 pounds of
Industrial Concrete Strength gel in my hair, and thus
I appeared on national television looking like Eddie

Now, Uncle Joe, if Dave Barry has to do all that,
to get his book to sell, no wonder our own 'Batty
Balls and other Wicket Wit' is not selling. We haven't
got it on to TV even once. Maybe you should start
thinking about streaking and getting arrested at the very
next Test Match at Lords. And find out if Geoffrey Boycott
maybe interested in doing a Brit version of 'Politically
Incorrect'. Give him the idea only if he's willing to have
you as a guest in the very first episode. As for me, I'm
trying to find out what A Dee Monster is ... and whether
Harsha Bogle would be interested in having one on his
show soon.

Next thing we'll have to figure out, is how to redirect all
the people who are going to go rushing off to bookstores
all over the world, to www.ah-mah-son.com .
But that should be much easier once we have step one
worked out ... right ?

(The only thing left would be to think of another title so that
we could put a toilet on the cover.)

With Regards,

Yours Sincerely

Comments  -

Click: The Ultimate Guide to Electronic Marketing for
Speakers, Authors, Coaches and Consultants...by Tom Antion

A breakthrough e-book which will show you how to build an
electronic marketing business from "square one" into a
five-figure . . . six figure . . . even a million dollar asset.

Adds Tom Antion "I don't have a tremendous amount of
basic computer knowledge. The technical stuff doesn't even
interest me. . . .
I like to write deposit slips, not programs.
I do know where to "click" to make money and this E-book
was designed to make it easy for you to click in the right place.

Adds Gunjan "Start by Clicking here" :-)

===========  This week's Humor ==============

The Sweet Way of Telling 'em...

A fellow is getting ready to tee-off on the first hole when a
second fellow approaches and asks if he can join him. The
first says that he usually plays alone, but agrees to let the
second guy join him. Both are even after the first couple
of holes. The second guy says, "Say, we're about evenly
matched; how about we play for five bucks a hole?"

The first fellow says that he usually plays alone and doesn't
like to bet, but agrees to the terms. Well, the second guy
wins the rest of the holes and as they're walking off of the
eighteenth hole, and while counting his $80.00, he confesses
that he's the pro at a neighboring course and likes to
pick on suckers.

The first fellow reveals that he's the parish priest at the local
Catholic church, at which the second fellow gets all flustered
and apologetic and offers to give the priest back his money.
The priest says, "No, no. You won fair and square and I was
foolish to bet with you. You keep your winnings."

The pro says, "Well, is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

The priest says, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make
a donation. Then, if you bring your mother and father by after Mass,
I'll marry them for you."

(From Dr Stan Kegel's Groaner's Digest

Comments :

===========  This week's Stress Reliever? ==============


I scored a moderate 6 out of 10. Do let me know how
you fare !

(Thanks tOM)

Comments or Submissions of your own favorites:


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