I-Laugh Archives
Your Working Humor Discussion List
....................................
I-Laugh - Your 'Working' Humor Discussion List
---------------------------------------------
Moderated by : Eva Rosenberg mailto:eva@workinghumor.com
Assisted By : Gunjan Saraf mailto:gunjan@workinghumor.com
http://workinghumor.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2nd June 2004 # Issue 161
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Be sincere; be brief; be seated.
~ Franklin Delano Roosevelt
More quotes on communication at :
http://www.workinghumor.com/quotes/communication.shtml
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IN THIS DIGEST :
Moderator's Comment
~ Gunjan
The Other Moderator's Comment
~ Eva
_______________________
CONTINUING DISCUSSIONS
The Swami's New Book
Speaking Tip
~ from Tom Antion
NEW DISCUSSIONS
Winding up a short presentation
~ Gunjan
Snubbed ? (Extract from Idle Ideas in 1905)
TWISTED LESSONS
THIS WEEK'S HUMOR
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
---------------- SPONSOR MESSAGE -----------------
"Need Ink?... Don't pay retail!"
Lot's of high quality solutions to Save You money...
Come see how you can Save on your printing costs!
Satisfaction IS Guaranteed at MaxPatch Ink!
http://www.maxpatchink.com/?laugh
------------------------------------------------------------
Moderator's Comment
----------
Dear LaughMates,
I've just received my copy 'Chips off the old Benchley' and am dying to start reading it so without any ado, here's
I-Laugh #161
;)
With best wishes
Gunjan
Many a true word is spoken in Jest
--------------------------------------
Jest for Pun - pun-subscribe@topica.com
Jest a Quote - quote-subscribe@topica.com
Jest in Literature (A) - lit-subscribe@topica.com
P
P.P.S - Please invite your friends to subscribe by sending an email to:
64841-subscribe@zinester.com
Please, send any comments to:
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=Comments
----------
The Other Moderator's Comment
----------
Dear LaughMates,
Once upon a time, long, long ago and far, far away, I really, really wanted to get a job that had nothing to
do with telephone soliciting.
I was young and poor and didn't want to have to pay any fees to get a job. Besides, no employment agency
would take me on, because I was under 18 anyway.
But there were these ads. I kept looking at these ads. Every day.
They ran in the classified section of the Daily Bruin, the UCLA student newspaper my brother brought
home every day.
The ads were compelling. Unique. I'd never seen anyone do this before. Or since. Sort of.
They were short. Three or four lines. They were different everyday, except the
company name and phone number.
They told a story. Each day brought another installment. Like a cartoon, without the pictures. You had to keep
coming back every day to read it. It was brilliant.
Even after I called them up and learned they charged $10 for three months use of their service, I was still
compelled to read their ads.
(To get the cost in perspective, our rent was $100.00)
I was not nearly as intrigued with the story line, though that was good, too. What got my attention
is the guy who wrote it. I wanted to know him. Or her.
I really liked that mind.
All right, as it turned out, they finally overcame my resistance to parting with that big chunk of money -
and I went to see them. They did, in fact, find me a
non-telephone soliciting job, just as I asked.
Then, liking these guys so much, I turned around and went to work for them - doing telephone soliciting to drum up
job openings for college students. Oh ironies.
It was the best job I ever had!
I guess phone sales isn't so bad - it depends on the product, eh?
What was your most memorable about face?
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=AboutFace
Your Humbled Guide,
Eva Rosenberg
TaxMama.com
-----------------------------------------------------------
Grumpiness CAN be cured ! And with kids the faster
you cure it the better. If the customer reviews on
Amazon.com are to be believed here's a sure-fire cure...
What Are YOU So Grumpy About?
http://snipurl.com/grumpy
------------------------------------------------------------
===== CONTINUING DISCUSSIONS ========
===> The Swami's New Book
Dear Laughmates,
As we've been enjoying Swami Beyondananda's old book - 'Duck Soup for the Soul', the Swami has been
upto naughtiness again and is getting ready to release a new book. Read his announcement...
BeyondaNews -- June 1, 2004
Swami for Precedent Special Edition
Out June 15th -- Order Special Autographed Copies Now
Well folks, over the weekend the Swami gave birth to a bouncing 208-page baby book! Instead of the usual nine
months, this one was cooked in just over three. Kudos to our book designers at Lightbourne, and to Brian Narelle for
his 50 illustrations to bring the book to life.
Since the focus of the book is the American Evolution, the "official" launch date is July 4th. However, a special
pre-pub edition will be out on June 15th, and anyone who orders books between now and then (including those who've already
pre-ordered books) will get this limited edition book with
Swami's autograph. (We deny vehemently that Swami's autographing has been out-sourced to an autographing
sweatshop in India!) By the way, Swami's Political Dictionary at the back of the book has more than 125 newly-coined
words waiting to be put into circulation ...
Click here to place your special order now -- have it in time for Father's Day!
http://www.wakeuplaughing.com/cgi-bin/thatsanorder_LE
Comments -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=swamiforprecedent
===> Speaking Tip
THE LAWS OF HUMOR Part II by Scott Friedman, CSP
Law #4 Your Success As A Speaker Will Be In Direct Proportion To The Amount Of Original Material You Use
The harder you are to duplicate, the more in demand you will be.
Personal stories are always best, because they give the audience a chance to get to know you. Vulnerability is your
greatest strength.
Law #5 If You Can't Find Funny Material, Change Your Glasses
Where to find humor:
1.Observe life. Life is filled with funny examples if you look through the eyes of humor. Life is just one long anecdote
waiting to be told.
2.Go to the library
3.Humor cassettes
4.Comedy clubs
5.Become an avid reader of magazines and periodicals
6.Radio and television
7.Hear as many speakers as you possibly can
8.Surround yourself with funny people and those capable of making others laugh and feel good about themselves
9.Subscribe to speaker's services
10.Humor writers
11.Software: Idea Fisher and Internet resources
12.Make up your own
Start a humor diary.
Law #6 Great Humor Is Not Written; It Is Rewritten
"The most common mistake in using humor is people give up too soon." Gene Peret
5 steps to writing original material:
A. Recall experiences from your past that are embarrassing, unusual, or funny.
B. Tell the story to friends. Make a note where they laugh.
C. Re-write. Eliminate unnecessary words and shorten. Put the biggest laugh at the end. A really good story explodes into
the punchline, which is nothing more than the unexpected truth that twists reality slightly. In humor, less is more.
D. When you're comfortable, start telling it from the platform. The pause will dramatically improve your timing and rhythm.
E. Add laugh lines. Keep editing. Tape every speech, then go through it. Try to find and increase the laugh lines.
Get a Humor Buddy to brainstorm with.
In Part III we will learn to "Fake" spontaneity
Scott Friedman,CSP, Motivational Humorist
Author of Using Humor For A Change
http://www.FunnyScott.com
[from Tom Antion's 'Great Speaking' newsletter.
To subscribe why not use our affiliate link (given below) ]
http://www.listpartners.com/cgi-local/subscribe?2606
Comments or if have you a tip to share -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=speakertips
------------------------------------------------------------
Click: The Ultimate Guide to Electronic Marketing for
Speakers, Authors, Coaches and Consultants...by Tom Antion
http://snurl.com/click
------------------------------------------------------------
========= NEW DISCUSSIONS =============
===> Winding up a Short Presentation
Dear Laughmates,
Recently I made a short presentation. It went off well. However the winding up was a big hit with quite a few
people in the audience.
The winding up was 3 slides ...
Slide 1 (out of the 3 winding up slides)
I have learnt a thing or two this summer and the most important thing I learnt was from the
poet A.R.Ammons.
One of his famous poems is titled "Their Sex Life".
Would you like to read the entire poem ?
Slide 2
Here it is .
Their Sex Life
One failure on
Top of another
~ A R Emmons
Slide 3
Do I need to say anything more about Brevity and Wit ???
Hope you enjoyed that and find it usable some time.
Please do share your own hits (and misses) with us.
~ Gunjan
Comments -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=windingup
===> Snubbed (Extract from Idle Ideas in 1905)
In real life I never knew but of one case where a man suffered in silence unpleasantness he could have ended
with a word; and that was the case of the late Corney Grain. He had been engaged to give his entertainment
at a country house. The lady was a nouvelle riche of snobbish instincts. She left instructions that Corney Grain
when he arrived was to dine with the servants. The butler, who knew better, apologised; but Corney was a man not
easily disconcerted. He dined well, and after dinner rose and addressed the assembled company.
"Well, now, my good friends," said Corney, "if we have all finished, and if you are all agreeable, I shall be pleased to
present to you my little show."
The servants cheered. The piano was dispensed with. Corney contrived to amuse his audience very well for
half-an-hour without it. At ten o'clock came down a message: Would Mr. Corney Grain come up into the
drawing-room. Corney went. The company in the drawing-room were waiting, seated.
"We are ready, Mr. Grain," remarked the hostess.
"Ready for what?" demanded Corney.
"For your entertainment," answered the hostess.
"But I have given it already," explained Corney; "and my engagement was for one performance only."
"Given it! Where? When?"
"An hour ago, downstairs."
"But this is nonsense," exclaimed the hostess.
"It seemed to me somewhat unusual," Corney replied; "but it
has always been my privilege to dine with the company I am asked to entertain. I took it you had arranged a little treat for the
servants."
And Corney left to catch his train.
(Extract from Jerome K Jerome's Idles Ideas in 1905)
Comments -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=snubbed
-----------------------------------------------------------
Oscar Wilde was the master of the studied insult. His jabs
at hypocrisy, pretense, and boring conventionality still have
a penetrating power. His snubs and put-downs became the
talk of his time, no less by his targets than by Oscar Wilde
himself. This collection features over 750 biting comments...
http://snurl.com/impwit
------------------------------------------------------------
============= Twisted Lessons ==============
[ W h a t I L e a r n e d d u r i n g
t h i s w e e k ]
One size won't fit all !
My Teacher -
Once, when I was home visiting my folks, my mom asked me to set the table for dinner. I opened the refrigerator, and taped to
the inside of the door was a risque picture of a lovely, slender, perfectly built, scantily-clad young woman.
"Mom, what's this?" I asked.
"Oh, I put that up there to remind me not to overeat," she answered.
"Is it working?" I asked.
"Yes and no," she replied. "I've lost 15 pounds, but
your dad has gained 20!"
(Thanks Jo-Lene's Daily Humor)
Comments -
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=TwistedLesson
=========== This week's Humor ==============
The Dog:
8am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
10am - Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
11am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
Noon - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
1pm - Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
3pm - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5pm - Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
7pm - Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9pm - Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!
The Cat:
Day 183 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try this at the top of the
stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try
this on their bed.
I decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt
to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good
little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and
smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how
to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is
obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.
(Thanks tOM)
Comments :
mailto:posts@workinghumor.com?Subject=humor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I
I-Laugh is edited by:
Eva Rosenberg mailto:eva@workinghumor.com
Information on how to advertise in I-Laugh :
http://workinghumor.com/advertise.shtml
FAQ, Information & Archives at our website,
http://workinghumor.com
© Copyright Gunjan Saraf and Eva Rosenberg
YOU have permission to publish any part of I-Laugh
electronically free of charge, under the following
conditions:
First: The author of the piece receives full credit,
with all links to their e-mail address &/or site intact
Second: The following byline is included.
"This article is reproduced with permission from I-Laugh,
Your Working Humor Discussion List.
http://www.workinghumor.com
© Copyright Gunjan Saraf and Eva Rosenberg "
However, if you are getting paid for your publication
(it is by paid subscription), please be good enough to
contact us to arrange a payment to us for the material
you are using.
A courtesy copy of your publication would be appreciated..
|
Home
I -Laugh
Info for Newbies
Submission Guidelines
Archives
Articles Index
Advertise
Business Cartoons
Business Cartoons
Resources
Selling Humor
Professional Humor
Medical Humor
Educational Humor
Military Humor
Advertising Humor
If you've had enough 'Serious' Humor relax in our 'pun' zone -
Jest For Pun
About Us
Contact Us
What's New ?!
Humorous Quotes
about Italy / Italians
Click Here
|