Allen's Axiom :
When all else fails, follow instructions.
Boob's Law :
You always find it in the last place you look
Schmidt's Law :
If you mess with something long enough, it will break.
Kaplan's Law of the Instrument :
Give a small boy a hammer and he will find that everything he encounters needs a pounding.
Paulsen's Law :
When anything is used to its full potential, it will break.
Segal's Law :
A man with one watch knows the time, a man with two watches is never sure.
Lowrey's Law :
It it jams, force it. If it breaks it needed replacement anyway.
Ralph's Observation :
It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.
Rosenbaum's Rule :
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
Sattinger's Law :
It works better if you plug it in.