Jest for Pun logo Murphy's Laws on Politics

Broder's Law :
Anybody that wants the presidency so bad that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.

Jacquin's Postulate on Democratic Government :
No man's life, liberty or property are safe while the legislature is in session.

Gilmer's Motto for Political Leadership :
Look over your shoulder now and then to be sure somebody's following you.

Gerrold's Pronouncement :
The difference between a politician and a snail is that the snail leaves its slime behind.

Walinsky's First Law of Political Campaigns :
If there are twelve clowns in a ring, you can jump in the middle and start reciting Shakespeare, but to the audience, you'll just be the thirteenth clown.

Cohen's Law of Alienation :
Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate.

Farrow's Finding :
If God had intended for us to vote, He would have given us candidates.

McCarthy's Law :
Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it's important.

Matsch's Maxim :
A fool in a high station is like a man atop a small mountain. Everything appears small to him and he appears small to everybody.

Parker's Rule of Parliamentary Procedure :
A motion to adjourn is always in order.

Cohen's Law of Permanence :
Political power is as permanent as today's newspaper.

Cohen's Subsidiary :
Politicians, like diapers, should be changed often and for the same reason.

Cohen's Law of Secrecy :
The best way to publicize a governmental or political action is to attempt to hide it.

Kent's Law :
The only way a reporter should look at a politician is down.

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