Jest for Pun logo My Favourite Punsters
Jim Ertner

  • What is the purpose of reindeer? 
    It makes the grass grow, sweetie.
  • Why couldn't the chicken find her eggs? 
    Because she mislaid them. 
  • What two classes is the animal kingdom divided into? 
    The aardvarks and the aaren'tvarks. 
  • What is a mouse's favorite game? 
    Hide and Squeak  
  • What did the chimpanzee say when his sister had a baby? 
    Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle.  
  • What did the coach say to his losing team of snakes? 
    You can't venom all. 
  • What happened to the woman with ten children? 
    She went stork raving mad.
  • What did the toy store sign say? 
    Don't feed the animals. They are already stuffed.
  • Why is a fisherman more honest than a shepherd? 
    A fisherman lives by hook while a shepherd lives by crook.
  • What do you call a baby monkey? 
    A chimp off the old block
  • What sign  did the grizzlies put up? 
    Support your right to bear arms.
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Have you checked out
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Jim Ertner has always been an incorrigible punster (please don't "incorrige" him!!).  He won second prize in the "Punniest of Show" at the 24th Annual O.Henry Pun-Off World Championships in May 2001 in Austin, Texas, and he returned in May 2002 and came in first place.  Following the last Pun-Off in Texas, Jim was interviewed for two different NPR shows (namely, "Weekend All Things Considered" on May 5 and "Only A Game" on May 9).

Jim puns best when he is punning with animals. If you didn't notice that above maybe you'll notice it as you peek at Animal puns with a Difference or Pun with Zebra Crossings

You should see his book "The Biggest Book of Animal Riddles"  (co-authored by best-selling writer Richard Lederer). It's simply fantastic and loads of pun. It's also available as an ebook which can be digitally downloaded for a very reasonable $2.95. Unfortunately the book works with Acrobat eBook Reader which is nothing like the Acrobat PDF reader most of us are used too. {I just can't believe that this software was created by Adobe (maybe it was co-created by Amazon ;)} If you buy the ebook at BN.com instead of following the link above you get it along with MicroSoft Reader .... Would that be any better ? ;-)

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