Pun ny Oneliners Page 2
- I spent a lot of my money on booze, babes and fast cars....The rest, I just squandered.
- When a guy says that he likes a woman's sense of humor, he ISN'T talking about her jokes. He's talking about appreciating his! (Archives)
- We're a fastidious couple... I'm fast.... She's tedious. (Archives)
- If you want a pretty nurse, you've got to be patient. (Archives)
How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, then he lies on
the other. (Don Thorn)
- The more things change, the more they stay insane. (Doug Aiken)
- Wear short sleeves. Support your right to bear arms. (Goeff Tibballs)
If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital. (E4Fun)
With everything you read about spray cans and the ozone layer it's
enough to scareosol to death. (Mike Bull)
- Many campaign promises are sound. Just sound! (The International Save
the Pun Foundation)
- I just need enough to tide me over until I need more!
- Wrestlers don't like to be put on hold.
- My check bounced because of insignificant funds.
Jan. 19, 1896 the first music patent was granted. The man who received it said he got it for a song. (Bob Weaver)
- I used to be a heavy gambler. But now I just make mental bets. That's how I lost my mind.
- A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge!
- Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids!
- "I needn't have been cloned," said Dolly sheepishly, "my family used to do exactly what I did anyway !"
It is rumored that Bobby Fischer got bored of playing chess with Russians. He asked the association to fix his next match with some other
Europeans. It seems his telegram read, " How about a Czech mate?" (Gunjan)
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