Humorous Quotes attributed to Brendan Behan
1923-1964, Irish Playwright and Author
- Ah, bless you, Sister, may all your sons be bishops.
- Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it's done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves.
- I am a drinker with writing problems.
- I have never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse.
- I saw a notice which said ‘Drink Canada Dry’ and I've just started.
- I was court-martial in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
- If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks.
- It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody.
- New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment... a place where you're least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.
- Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in.
- The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.
- The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
- There is no such thing as bad publicity except your own obituary.
- To get enough to eat was regarded as an achievement. To get drunk was a victory.
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