Humorous Quotes about
Love

If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books. ~ Alan King

Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love ~ Albert Einstein

Love - A temporary insanity curable by marriage. ~ Ambrose Bierce

He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals. ~ Benjamin Franklin

No woman marries for money; they are all clever enough, before marrying a millionaire, to fall in love with him first. ~ Cesare Pavese

Love is not the opposite of hate. Love and hate are very similar emotions. Like a faucet with hot and cold handles, both temperatures of water come out of the same faucet. The opposite of love is indifference. Like a faucet with no water coming out. ~ Dave Berg (My Friend God)

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. ~ David Bissonette

Love is something sent from Heaven to worry the hell out of you. Dolly Parton ~ My Life and Other Unfinished Business

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. ~ Erich Segal

Love is foolish ... but I still might try it sometime. ~ Floyd 'Age 9'

Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there. ~ George Burns (Gracie)

Love had forged ahead so swiftly that in no time it had displaced agriculture as the leading industry of the period. To anyone who has tried both, this wont come as much of a surprise. ~ Groucho Marx (Memoirs of a Mangy Lover)

Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks. ~ Groucho Marx (Memoirs of a Mangy Lover)

You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it. ~ Henny Youngman

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. ~ Henry Louis Mencken

Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it? ~ Homer Simpson

If I love you, what business is it of yours? ~ Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

There is love of course. And then there's life, its enemy. ~ Jean Anouilh

It's really extraordinary what a variety of ways of loving there must be. We all do it as it was never done before. ~ Jerome K Jerome (Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow)

Love is too pure a light to burn long among the noisome gases that we breathe, but before it is choked out we may use it as a torch to ignite the cozy fire of affection. ~ Jerome K Jerome (Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow)

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question? ~ Lily Tomlin

Like the measles, love is most dangerous when it comes late in life. ~ Lord Byron

We don't believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack. ~ Marie E. Eschenbach

Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it. ~ Maurice Chevalier

Ah -- love -- the walks over soft grass, the smiles over candlelight, the arguments over just about everything else. ~ Max Headroom

You can't put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories. ~ Melanie Clark

The only victory over love is flight. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry. ~ Oscar Wilde

I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough. ~ Regina 'Age 10'

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. ~ Robert Frost

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin-it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring. ~ S. J. Perelman

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it. ~ Woody Allen

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox. ~ Woody Allen

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