Humorous Quotes attributed to Oscar Wilde
1856-1900, Irish Author, Wit

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal. (The Critic as Artist)

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. (The Picture of Dorian Gray)

A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. (The Picture of Dorian Gray)

A pessimist is one who, when he has a choice of two evils, chooses both.

Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

Anybody can make history. Only a great man can write it. (The Critic as Artist)

Anybody can write a three-volume novel. It merely requires a complete ignorance of both life and literature. (The Critic as Artist)

Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friend's success.

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

Don't talk about action... Its basis is the lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream. (The Critic as Artist)

Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. (Lady Windemere's Fan)

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.

Few parents nowadays pay any regard to what their children say to them. The old-fashioned respect for the young is fast dying out. (The Importance of being Earnest)

How clever you are, my dear! You never mean a single word you say. (A Woman of No Importance)

I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself. (An Ideal Husband)

I am not young enough to know everything.

I can resist everything except temptation. (Lady Windermere's Fan)

I do not approve of anything that tampers with natural ignorance. Ignorance is like a delicate exotic fruit; touch it and the bloom is gone. (The Importance of Being Earnest)

I love acting. It is so much more real than life. (The Picture of Dorian Gray)

I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability.

If one tells the truth, one is sure, sooner or later, to be found out. (Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young)

In America the President reigns for four years, and Journalism governs for ever and ever. (The Soul of Man under Socialism)

It is better to be beautiful than to be good. But on the other hand, no one is more ready than I am to acknowledge that it is better to be good than to be ugly. (The Picture of Dorian Gray)

Men always want to be a woman's first love. Women like to be a man's last romance.

Moderation is a fatal thing, Lady Hunstanton. Nothing succeeds like excess. (A woman of No Importance)

No woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating. (The Importance of Being Earnest)

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.

One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who would tell one that, would tell one anything. (A Woman of No Importance)

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

The cynic knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

The difference between journalism and literature is that journalism is unreadable and literature is not read.

The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable. (A Woman of No Importance)

The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. (The Picture of Dorian Gray)

The play was a great success, but the audience was a disaster.

The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.

The truth is rarely pure and never simple. Modern life would be very tedious if it were either, and modern literature a complete impossibility! (The Importance of being Earnest)

The well-bred contradict other people. The wise contradict themselves.

To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.(The Picture of Dorian Gray)

To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness. (The Importance of being Earnest)

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. (An Ideal Husband)

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. (Lady Windermere's Fan)

Women love us for our defects. If we have enough of them, they will forgive us everything, even our gigantic intellects. (A Woman of No Importance)

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