Jest for Pun logo Murphy's Laws on Science and Technology

Felt's Law of the Lab :
Never replicate a successful experiment.

Boyle's Law :
When things are going well, someone will inevitably experiment detrimentally.

Murphy's Law of Technology :
You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track.

Von Braun's Law of Gravity :
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.

Douglas's Law of Practical Aeronautics :
When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of the plane,
the plane will fly.

1st Law of Serendipity :
In order to discover anything you must be looking for something.

Burn's Balance :
If the assumptions are wrong, the conclusions aren't likely to be very good.

Murphy's Logical Law :
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

First Law of Laboratory Work :
Hot glass looks exactly the same as cold glass.

Finagle's Law :
In any collection of data, the figure most obviously correct, beyond all need of checking, is the mistake.

Murphy's Law of Research :
Enough research will tend to support your theory.

Mr. Cooper's Law :
If you do not understand a particular word in a piece of technical writing, ignore it. The piece will make perfect sense without it.

The Golden Rule of Arts and Science :
Whoever has the gold makes the rules.

Murphy's Law of Super Speciality :
An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.

Harvard Law :
Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, any experimental organism will do as it damn well pleases.

Saunder's Discovery :
Laziness is the mother of nine inventions out of ten.

Young's Handy Guide to Modern Sciences :
If it is green or wiggles - it is Biology.
If it stinks - it is Chemistry.
If it doesn't work - it is Physics.

Paradox of Selective Equality :
All things being equal, all things are never equal.

Gilbs's Law of Unreliability :
At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer.

Golub's Law of Computerdom :
A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.

Troutman's Law of Computer Programming :
Profanity is the one language all programmers know well.

Hoare's Law of Large Programs :
Inside every large program is a small program struggling to get out.

Computer Programmer's Credo #73 :
Documentation is like sex: When it is good, it is VERY good; and when it's bad, it's still better than nothing at all.

Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited.

The only prefect science is hindsight.

If builders built buildings the way programmers write programs,
then the first wood pecker that came along would destroy civilization.

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